India

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  1. A lot of people have an entry in the Guinness Book of Records for weird things.
  2. Was named by a rabid Hoosiers fan.
  3. Successfully sued Indonesia in 1648 for plagiarism of national name. Royalties from Indonesia now account for 35% of India's national gross income.
  4. India supplies more than half the spiritual gurus of the civilized world. Tibet produces two thirds of the remaining portion.
  5. Everyone in India is either hindu or buddhist. Except the Parsis. They're Zorro-worshippers.
  6. India is the world's largest manufacturer of ink. Originally they only used it to put dots on their foreheads, but Marco Polo taught them to sell it to monks, who used it to write books of psalms, translations of scripture, and grocery lists. Profits really started soaring when Hindenberg invented the printing press. We all know what a disaster that turned out to be.
  7. India is not as crowded as Japan. They struggle tirelessly to rectify this state of affairs.
  8. Everyone in India is a swami, or knows a swami. Or both.
  9. There is a rigid caste system in India. Some people are not allowed to be swamis. Some people are not allowed not to be.
  10. Cows are holy in India. In Jersey, they are spotty.
  11. Nobody uses leather in India. It is a well-known fact that the Fonz is not an indian.
  12. George Dubya Bush does not wear leather. Case in point.
  13. A lot of people don't know the difference between hinduism and buddhism. Some of these people are hindu or buddhist. They aren't sure which.
  14. Everyone in India is now a technical support person for the Dell corporation.
  15. Once a year everyone in India, regardless of religion, makes a pilgrimage to the sacred Gangrene River. There they engage in the world's longest and most crowded canoe race.
  16. They have the best programmers in the world and Saurab from New Deli is their leader! He is the one who has introduced computing to India!
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